harassment et al part 2

I know what sexual abuse is. Don't you?
I know what they're saying when someone says they've been sexually molested. I bet you do, too. I know what attack means. I know what rape is. Do you?
So, I don't want to talk about those things. Those acts are real. Physical. Tragic.

I want to talk about, allegations. Harassment. Sexual harassment. Misconduct.

Allegations. What happened to, until proven guilty? Yikes. People are being fired left and right because someone said somebody did something. Sure, sometimes that's an appropriate response, but not every time!

Harassment. I've been harassed. I've been sexually harassed. I bet you would be hard pressed to find a woman anywhere in this country, by today's standards, that has not been harassed, ever. In general or sexually. Harassment seems to be so vague to people. If I'm offended because the guy in the cube next to me is telling dirty jokes to his buddy on the phone - is that sexual harassment? Or is it misconduct? It's not directed at ME. If it were me, I would just go over and say, dude, I don't want to listen to your dirty jokes, keep it down. Now, if he gave me a bunch of shit, that's harassment and I would have to tattle on him for being a jerk. But, if my male boss says, I'm gonna give this job to John, unless you fill in the blank.
That's totally about power and control and he's BIG jerk and that's sexual harassment.

Misconduct. Oy. Now the line is becoming real blurry. (For now, I mean verbal misconduct.) Mario Batali, the big chef, has stepped down because of allegations of sexual misconduct. He's 57. Not that that matters, but it kind of does. It speaks to the mindset of a culture. Poor Mario grew up in a culture where it was ok to make sexist remarks and be rude. Until now, maybe no one told him, that's not cool, knock it off. I grew up in the 70's. There was a whole lot of sexual misconduct going on!!!! Everywhere! Whoa. And what about the 60's? Sex, drugs and rock and roll?!?!?!? Sometimes it was a wold whistle or snarky comment. Sometimes it was just that creep that pinched your butt. And that goes for her pinching his butt too! Yeah. I did that in the 70's. I'm guilty of sexual misconduct. Boy am I!
I'm having trouble with whatever sexual misconduct is. 

I was just thinking the other day, there are a lot of unacceptable behaviors today, that were perfectly fine 20 years ago. People learned, grew, and moved on. Like; teachers spanking kids in school. That used to be ok. Now it's not. Our opinions and ideas changed and it became a bad thing - we demanded an end to that behavior and moved on. How about the mom that pulled up to the grocery store and told her kids she'd be right back, wait in the car! She could go to jail for that now. But should I press charges against my mom for doing that to me, 20 years ago? 

Change is good. I would just hate to see us go so overboard that we won't be taken seriously. 

Every revolution has growing pains I guess.